Growing up, most of us in India were taught that being hit or scolded by teachers and parents was for our own good. Proverbs like "Laaton ke bhoot baaton se nahi maante" (Stubborn people only learn through harsh measures) and “Ek thappad se kya farak padta hain” (One slap won’t impact anyone) reinforced the idea that harsh measures were necessary for discipline. But how much of this belief holds true today?

A 2018 study by Agrasar revealed that 80% of school-going children in India face daily corporal punishment, with 90% of parents approving it.[i] As adults, many repeat this cycle with their own children. To understand its long-term impact and gain insights, we spoke to working professionals aged 25–40 about their experiences.

Hidden Scars of Childhood Punishment

“I freeze in the presence of authority. Fear from school days—sweaty hands, anxious
dreams—still haunts me. I struggle with public speaking and wish someone had helped
me overcome this fear earlier.”

- Ashutosh, Fashion Designer

“I grew up scared to talk to my parents, fearing punishment. Even now, I avoid admitting
mistakes and struggle to connect with others, afraid of being judged.”

- Ramit, Entrepreneur

“I grew up in fear—doing things I didn’t want to, just to avoid punishment. I learned to
lie. The anger from those moments stayed with me, driving me to take up martial arts so
I’d never feel powerless again”

- Abhishek, Author and Consultant

Out of 32 respondents, 25 reported that childhood punishment profoundly and
negatively impacted their personalities. Common effects included lying or hiding things,
struggling to trust or connect with others, stage fright, avoiding mistakes at work,
hesitating to express feelings, and seeking constant validation. While punishment is
often justified as a way to teach discipline, these conversations revealed a stark truth: it
doesn’t instill discipline but leaves lasting scars that overshadow its intended lessons.

Moments That Stay

“My Grade 6 teacher slapped me and made me kneel for hours. I still feel sad and angry
thinking about it.”

Sarthak, Consultant with Big 4

“The sting of that first slap in Grade 4 and the wooden ruler on my knuckles in Grade 10—those moments stay with you.”

Tuhina, Educator

Most interviewees vividly recalled when and why they were punished by teachers or
parents. I still remember my math teacher in Grades 4–6 spanking me for asking questions I didn’t understand, which instilled a lasting fear of numbers—a struggle I face at work even today. Many shared that revisiting these memories evokes anger and
sadness.

Discipline or Damage?

“Punishment didn’t help me. As an act of rebellion, I didn’t take biology in Grade 12.
Now, I constantly seek fulfillment through helping others.”

Prayas, PhD Student

Parents and teachers often believe punishment instills discipline and improves performance. However, all 32 respondents disagreed, stating it harmed their well-being and decision-making.

Breaking the Cycle

“Breaking the patterns of the past is challenging, but it’s our responsibility to unlearn what we once endured.”

Rashmi, Educator and Parent

“Despite my military background, I would never resort to physical punishment with my children.”

Akash, Naval Officer

Something that struck a chord with me was that everyone interviewed echoed the same
thought: the importance of empowering individuals to completely eliminate corporal
punishment. While Section 17 of the Indian Right to Education Act imposes an absolute
ban on corporal punishment in [most] schools, our analysis indicates that enforcement remains
inconsistent across India. Some states have explicitly prohibited it, while others still have gaps in policy and implementation. Limited awareness, ineffective monitoring, and weak enforcement allow corporal punishment to persist in many schools. We must break this cycle—not just through laws but by shifting mindsets and embracing non-violent approaches to discipline. If we reject humiliation and violence for ourselves, how can we accept it for our children?

[i] https://agrasar.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/07/Choking-Childhood.pdf